Don't worry, more jokes will be coming soon.
But that is what I am worried about.
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What is the tallest building in your town?
The library because it has many stories.
What month do soldiers really hate?
Why were the Medieval times
called the Dark Ages?
Because they had a lot of Knights.
What kind of driver never gets a speeding ticket?
What is the last letter of everything? The letter G.
What is the coldest row
in any theater?
The Z row.
A new crematory came to town and it really burn people up.
What kind of fish make people rich?
What kind of fish do cat's like?
How do fish determine their own weight?
They use their own scales.
What kind of insect do English teachers like?
A spelling Bee.
It is about time the people at the US Mint does something construction instead of just sitting there making money.
What is big, white, has wings but can not fly?
The White House
What do you call a room that no one can enter?
What is the difference between a dirty penny and a clean dime?
What kind of horse has wings?
How many fathers did Lincoln have?
Four, all in the Gettysburg address.
What do you call a cat on the beach at
When does an animal shelter
When it rains cats and dogs.
Why are elephants so strong?
Because they have to carry their trunk.
What kind of ships do judges take?
What kind of ships
do not float?
If I went in, but you came out of the sun,
would it then be a...
What kind of keys unlock cemeteries?
What key has 4 legs and moves?
What coat is only put on when it is wet?
Coat of paint.
When you are not feeling well, you should rub your finger over the computer screen below slowly and then you will feel...
What state makes the most pencils?
A sick women went to a shoe store to get healed.
A Pastor went to the same store to save some souls.
A new shoe store owner soon realize that his shop was not a shoe in. So he worked on a shoe string budget and put his soul into it. This gave him a boot in business and for him it generated a foot in a door.
A coworker asked if I had a ruler.
I relayed, "Yes,
but she is at home."
Which moves faster heat or cold?
Heat because you can always catch a cold.
Why did a stick lady go to the store?
She heard they were giving free handouts on
What do you call a Doctor who lost his patience?
What occupation do Presidents become good at during their term in office? Cabinet making.
Without Santa, Christmas will not be a cause.
Kids like seeing Santa because of his presences.
Management rush to the Gift Wrap Center because employees were
boxing and rapping.
Why can you not smell a dollar bill?
Because they have no cent.
Why are empty matchboxes preferred over full ones?
Because they matchless.
The copy center hired two Kates because they wanted duplicates.
What occupation dresses rabbits?
A local fire station had a women only crew because the Chief fired men.
How do locomotives hear?
Thorugh their engine ears.
What do ducks do when their bills get too big?
They make a run on the bank.
Why did hunters rush to the bank? Because they herd there were only two bucks left.
A skeleton went to McDonald's and asked for a coke and a bucket.
A tombstone store went out of business because they were taken for granite.
A Varicose doctor's work is in vein.
Doctors are now requiring all
roofers to get a shingles shot.
What do you call a teacher with
They had to put a fence up around the local graveyard.
People were dying to get in.
When is an apple not an apple? When it is sold as a pair.
A dog lost his tail so they sent him to a retail store.
What do you call cattle without legs?
What do you call an alligator
in a vest? In vest a gator.
Two Scouts must work on merit badges together because of
their motto "Always be paired".